Develop A Belief System That Works For You #motownmom #selfcare 💌🤟🏿

It is interesting to note that most of society is free.

There is a percentage of the populous that is incarcerated for crimes against society. So too, are there people who live in political cultures that do not value the freedom of its’ people. Nevertheless, the majority of the people in the world live in relative freedom. They can choose whom they marry, what they do for a living, and where they live. Most societies allow their people to move around freely without restraint. As long as an individual is obeying the laws, that person has wide latitude in conduct.

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The freedoms offered by governments are physical freedoms that all its’ law abiding members enjoy. However, many operate in a “prison like” atmosphere regardless of what they are given. This prison does not exist on the material plane. Rather, it is a creation of the mind. It is manufactured from an individual’s belief system. These beliefs become people’s jailers.

Most will tell you that they can think for themselves. To suggest that they are incapable of creating their own ideas is met with an overwhelming attitude to the contrary. All their success, experiences, and intelligence give a sense of independence. They mistakenly believe that their belief systems is of their own making. Unfortunately for them, it is not.

A fundamental concept to creating the life that you desire is to create a belief system that works for you. Contrary to what most think, our beliefs systems are shaped by the influences around us. Teachers, parents, friends, co-workers, and institutions all have input into the beliefs that we live by. Have you ever noticed how children’s ideas often reflect those of their parents? This is so common that political organizations poll school children during Presidential elections because they accurately reflect the sentiment of the adults.

The governments of the world are masters at shaping the belief system of its’ people. Through the use of propaganda, public opinion is swayed based upon the desires of those in power. This is often done in the name of nationalism. A group of people is established as a threat to the society. Events are shown to validate this viewpoint while creating the emotional dislike towards that group. Thus, the government is free to act as it see fit with the full support of its people. Unfortunately, most people do not have firsthand experience to form a solid conclusion. Of course, they will defend their belief even though that are not certain where it came from.

It is common for people and organizations to manipulate other’s beliefs for the sake of control. The government is one example. Some religions throughout history has acted in a similar manner. They used threat of an angry Deity and eternal damnation to control the masses. There were numerous instances where the Church of England was the most powerful organization in Europe. With a following that is under control, it is much easier to maintain influence. Naturally, there are many denominations where this is not the case. So, too, are their many people who’s lives are enhanced by their religious affiliation. Unfortunately, this is not true in all instances.

The key to a belief systems is creating one that works for you. As an adult, you have the freedom to believe anything that you desire. Spending time questioning where some of your beliefs came from is healthy. It is also effective to determine whether they still work for you. If they assist you into being happy, joyous, and free, then they are worthwhile. However, when they instill pain, perhaps it is time to rethink them.

Ironically, the beliefs that seem to cause the most chaos in people’s lives come from those who love us the most. Many individuals suffer from psychological disorders due to the influences of their parents. Things such as low self esteem, abandonment, and sexual issues all come from our upbringing. Typically, one who suffer from any of these, was made to feel guilty and shameful. Their worth was shown to be tied to their performance which never was good enough. Mistakes were not forgiven but something to be used as a weapon to make the other feel worse. All this was done as a form of control.

Leap forward 20 years and you find that a person who grew up in this atmosphere often still carries these beliefs. Even though recent experiences will prove to the contrary, the individual still hears the words of the parent. It affects the relationships with friends, lovers, coworkers, and oneself. Without some help, the person is often incapable of healthy interaction with others. There is a degree of sickness in all that is done. Thus, the individual turns to other things to fill that void that exists whether it is drugs, alcohol, sex, or food. However, if the belief system was viewed as insane, the person might be apt to change it. Simply altering a few of the basic beliefs one holds regarding oneself miraculously changes life.

The more that we can accept that it is likely that what we believe came from other, the better our chances are of attaining freedom. There are many things that were taught to us by others growing up which serve us well. This is especially true if we were raised in a loving home. However, society being as selfish as it is, there is much that stands in our way of happiness. Analyzing our belief system gets to the root of what motivates us. A system that contains a great deal of fear will cause one to often act out of that fear. The opposite is also true. To create ‘our’ life, it begins with creating ‘our’ own belief system.

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Can You Say Yes To Happiness : 11 Practical Steps You Can Take To Make It Really Happen 💪🏿💘#motownmom

Think about it … every single thing we do is intended to make us happier.

And yet sometimes we get diverted and do things that actually move us away from this goal.

We all have the potential for genuine happiness. There is no gene or DNA marker that determines who will be happy and who will not. We make choices throughout our lives, and the result of all these choices combined, determines our level of happiness. Make the right choices and happiness can be yours.

Photo by RF._.studio on Pexels.com

Here are just a sampling of some of the tactics we can employ in an 11-point roadmap to help guide us toward genuine happiness:

  1. Look For The Positive In Everything: There is an old saying that nothing is inherently good or bad—what makes it one or the other, is merely your reaction to it. Find the positive and you will be happier. Those who soar against all odds, do so because they look at the positive that could come out of their situation, how ever bad it may seem to others.
  2. Accentuate The Positive: We all grow up with a “positivity imbalance”—the result of society’s norms and rules being based on restriction and punishment more than approval and reward. From a young age we are taught what we must not do instead of what we may do. Even in day-to-day life, there is more negative influence that positive. Luckily you can work to improve the balance. Celebrate the positive and work to get more of it. When you achieve something, congratulate yourself! Look for things you find uplifting, that make you happy. Get more of that! At the same time, reduce your exposure to negative input, whether it is the daily news, or people you don’t feel good around. You know your buttons…make sure the positive ones are pushed more than the negative.
  3. Practice Good Selfishness: When we were young we were taught that putting our interests before those of others is wrong. This is particularly true for women, many of whom sacrifice their dreams and ambitions to help others achieve theirs. It is also common in the corporate world where the good of the company is considered more important than the good of the individual. It is good to help others, yet we should have boundaries to protect ourselves from being manipulated or abused by others. You are important, and if you don’t look after yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually, you cannot expect anyone else to do so.
  4. Listen To Your Feelings: All feelings are good. Every feeling occurs for a reason: it is delivering a message. Sometimes that message is pleasant, other times not. Our tendency is to distract ourselves from unpleasant feelings, often through smoking, drinking or drugs of one kind or another. When you feel bad, avoid distracting yourself, and identify the reason—there is some need not being met.
  5. Give Of Yourself: The more you give, the more you receive. There is probably no scientific study proving this to be so, but unconditional giving is hugely rewarding. It seems that the more of yourself you give, the greater the thrill and uplifting effect on your psyche. Help the needy. Give time if you can. Give anonymously, even if you lose the tax deduction!
  6. Make It Happen: You have the ability to make things happen using your mind. Top sports stars, and business people use it, and so can you. There are many ways of doing this; one of the common methods is to use visualization—getting a picture in your mind of whatever it is that you want to happen. It does not actually have to be a visual picture; it could be a feeling, a smell, a sound, or any combination of the senses. Imagine finding the perfect parking near the entrance as you arrive at the supermarket or mall … the sky is the limit, but persevere! We are not used to utilizing this tool, so it takes practice.
  7. Accept The Things You Cannot Change: We resist things we don’t like, and often expend a tremendous amount of energy on this resistance. Whilst this can be good, and has resulted in tremendous advances through history, we should work to understand those things we cannot change, and then move on. Rather use the saved energy on something more worthwhile and productive. This is not to say that you should complacently accept anything. If you truly desire change, you should work towards that change; but spending time worrying about something without actively working to change it is unproductive and damaging to your wellbeing.
  8. Take Responsibility For Your Choices: Everything that you do, or don’t do, is because of choices you make (or don’t make). It is easier and convenient to blame outside causes for things that go wrong in life, but your life is the sum of all the choices you make along the way—sometimes that choice it to let somebody else make a choice on your behalf. If you tend to blame other people or things, it may be scary to take responsibility for what happens in your life, but it is really quite liberating because instead of seeing yourself as an effect of outside forces, you realize you are the cause of everything good you achieve. Don’t abdicate responsibility for your life.
  9. Schedule Regular “Self Time”: Spend some time analyzing where you are in life, your strengths and weaknesses. How can you turn the latter into the former? Think about your views on everything from your job to global warming and the existence of aliens—then work out why you feel the way you do. Is your reasoning sound? The better you understand yourself, the better you understand the world.
  10. Make Time To Meditate: We spend almost all our time thinking of the past or planning for the future. We seldom spend time in the present. It has reached a point where, for most of us, it seems impossible to keep our focus on what is happening right now. Your meditation could be formal meditation or prayer, but it could be as simple as merely focusing on each breath as it goes in and out for five or ten minutes, dismissing past and future thoughts as they arise—and they will!
  11. Remove Your Limitations: When we fail, usually the reason is simply because we don’t believe we are able or worthy of whatever it is that we fail to achieve. Most often, this belief is actually false; the result of negative programming received since childhood. The truth is that most of us are able to do most of what we really want to do … you just have to believe. The best way to start is with small things, working your way up as you notice the limits dissolving.

The more successful you are at assimilating the concepts and processes described in these eleven points into your life, the more genuinely happy you will be, and the happiness will last!

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Find updated food pantries in Metro Detroit #motownmoxiemom

Related image

  • Food banks and free food pantries in Detroit as well as Wayne County, plus other services Click here

If you have an exclusive food giveaway event coming up, please leave in the comments.

Watch “How to Be Kinder to Ourselves” on YouTube #motownmom #selfcare

Be Happy: Do Your Duty Happily without Attachment to its Results #MotownMom ☺

Happiness is not living in a fool’s paradise.

It is not living in oneself oblivious of outside world.

Life is not a bed of roses.

Here one has to struggle and fight for justice.

Photo by TUBARONES PHOTOGRAPHY on Pexels.com

All our actions are with a view to some results. But often we fail to achieve that result. Sometime we get even opposite results than our expectations. For example, when we do a good turn to somebody and instead of being grateful to use the person accuses us. Failure in achieving our goal often leads us to unhappiness.

What is the solution to it?

Gita, the Hindu religious and philosophical text, which is perhaps the only religious book in the world that was delivered amidst battlefield, has a beautiful solution. It says,

“You have right to action only, never to its results; never be attached to the results of your actions; but don’t take to inaction also.” Gita (2.47)

How beautiful and unique!

In essence it teaches us that one should do one’s duty without being unduly concerned about its results. It does not mean that one should do whatever comes to one’s fancy without regard to its consequences. In fact, duty means prescribed duty. Its results cannot be undesirable. But the action may result in success or failure. We should not be unduly concerned with this. The cause of all unhappiness is thwarted desires. This does not teach us to be indifferent to the results of our actions and do them indifferently. It teaches us to do our best. If then the results are not as we had expected, we should have faith in God.

Mind you, all this preaching about detachment from the results of one’s action is being taught at the battle field of Mahabharat when a great war is just to be fought. This war is between cousin brothers, and near relatives are fighting on the opposing sides. Arjun has said that he did not want to fight a war in which he has to kill not only near relatives but elders and teachers. Krishna is trying to tell him that it is his duty to fight. The reward is a great kingdom. Yet Krishna is talking of fighting a war at the cost of dying or killing one’s near and dear, and yet doing so without attachment to its results!

Yet, if you come to think of it, it is the best theory about life. Attachment brings uncertainty, worry, and tension. In fact, this non-attachment to the results is very psychological too.

Too much worry about the results of our actions affects the latter negatively.

BE HAPPY!

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Support Habitat for Humanity Detroit (@habitatdetroit) by shopping at #Krogers & #Amazon | #motownmom

Construction Volunteer Opportunities – Habitat for Humanity Detroit

We wanted to make sure that you know that you can support HFHD through your regular shopping habits! As we move into the New Year, please make sure you are registered to support Habitat for Humanity Detroit through Amazon and Kroger so we can get the rewards. This is a very easy way to passively increase our revenue to support our programs. Please also share with your family and friends.

Kroger - Kroger Community Rewards

KROGER

You can support Habitat for Humanity Detroit just by shopping at Kroger when you enroll in the Kroger Community Rewards® program. Sign up and Kroger will make a donation to Habitat Detroit every time you shop and use your Kroger Plus Card. Please follow the steps below to register your Kroger Plus Card:

  • To enroll your card go to KrogerCommunityRewards.com.
  • Click “create an account”. 
  • Put in your email address and password. Confirm your password.
  • Enter Kroger Plus Card number OR alt ID number.
  • Go to Community Rewards (near bottom).
  • Follow through the steps (name, address, etc.).
  • Put in Habitat for Humanity Detroit or the group number (82334).
  • Choose the correct organization.
  • Click Enroll. 

If you are having an issue with registering your card please call 1-800-KROGERS, press 5 for customer service, press 5 to speak to a customer service representative.

It's Easy to Support the LightHouse through Amazon Smile - LightHouse for  the Blind and Visually Impaired

AMAZON SMILE

You can also support Habitat for Humanity Detroit just by shopping online at Amazon. 

  • Go to Smile.Amazon.Com and login with your Amazon credentials. 
  • In the search box for “Find Your Charity”, type Habitat for Humanity Detroit and select the correct organization. 
  • When you shop, go to Smile.Amazon.Com each time (Amazon will even remind you!) to have 0.5% of your purchase price donated to Habitat Detroit!

Habitat for Humanity Detroit Office: 313-521-6691 Cell: 248-914-3930 

Become A Member of the Detroit People’s Food Co-Op #motownmom

DPFC & KAN Books Co-Op Member Mama Hanifa Adjuman Speaking during DPFC Annual Meeting 2019.
For the past several years there has been a movement to change the culture of food in the city of Detroit. Food sovereignty. What does it look like to own what you eat and not have your food be controlled by outside forces? What does it mean to not only be a headcount in a community meeting but a decision maker on what actually happens in the spaces that impact us most like where we get our food.
Early DPFC Meeting December 2015 @ Red Door Digital. Photographer: Jamii Tata.
Today is a great day to affirm sovereignty in our food system. Become a member of the Detroit People’s Food Co-Op or donate to create an opportunity for another Detroiter to become a member as we move us closer to being a city with a community controlled and owned grocery store in the North End neighborhood of Detroit.

Rendering of the Detroit Food Commons where the Detroit People’s Food Co-Op Grocery Store will Live. Rendering by Russell Baltimore of Baltimore Design.

To join, please visit: https://detroitpeoplesfoodcoop.com/register/. To donate, visit: https://detroitpeoplesfoodcoop.com/contact/. For support with the application, questions on payments or to hear from another co-op member please email: kanbooks@knowallegiance.org.

*The Detroit People’s Food Co-Op is an independent organization. Know Allegiance Nation and KAN Books are partners that support DPFC. All words and sentiments above are representative of Know Allegiance Nation. Learn more about DPFC here: https://detroitpeoplesfoodcoop.com/about-us/.

#detroitraised garden👩🏾‍🌾 diary 📑 | Week 14 of 2021 | Zone6 | #motownmom 🌱

So A lot has happened and I need to get some pictures outside to show the progress of the garden

Here’s what I’ve planted in the past weeks

More Potatoes (two more red bags)

And using my memory going around the garden I’ve planted :

(On the side of the porch)

Broccoli | Leeks | Onions (scallions) – 2 planters | Beans | eggplants | Chinesse lettuce, butterhead lettuce | gypsophila | paw paw

And then there are two new asparagus growing – one in the swan and the other in a large tub (love Dollar General)

(by the driveway )

Morning glory | purslane | Beans

Moving inside of the greenhouse there should be basil| dill, parsley and | thyme | more eggplant (but i think it’s dead)

Next to that is the Marigold, which the grass is starting to take over. Ugh…

Getting on the porch:

I’ve planted tulips, carrots, another eggplant (which seems to actually be growing) more leeks, garlic, ginger, beans and okra

Another set of lettuce and Chinese broccoli in white pans because I thought the initial stuff was going to die

On the side of the porch to the left

The corn, water, tomato seeds, squash, spearmint, mint, purple basil, green basil, more eggplant and zucchini, also the cucumbers (2 pots this year). More peas and beans are planted in between the corn and then I’m going to put more squash around the edges to keep the squirrel from getting to the corn when it grows up.

Next to the herb raised bed is the carrots and the Brussel sprouts but I’m fighting the grass in that bed.

You can kind of see that area next to the potato bag pictures

Update on the indoor ginger: It died. I don’t know what else to say. (but I’m growing two more so we’ll see)

And then there is my asparagus from last year. So happy

I was even able to a harvest which I’ll be eating today. The lettuce came from the green container from last year and it’s still growing!

I ordered Wild Creeping Thyme, sTevia, more purslane and Black Krim Heirloom Tomato. I might do some of the Wild Creeping Thyme and Stevia, but the rest I might wait until next year to plant these

I bought sage and another tomato plant today and I’ll try to take pictures for my next update

these are just extra pictures of the beans i was growing in dollar tree containers in the hosue and then planting them outside in various places

And finally, I’m learning how to grow an orchid. You DON’T put it in dirt.

They grow in wood chips, so I got them and I’ll be replanting my orchid in a larger container and having it grow some more hopefully.

I started my hydroponics garden in the house and then I still want to start my herbs inside the house too, so I’ll get you guys more pictures and an update soon.

I think that’s about it as an update for the garden diary. Let me know about your garden in Detroit or in an urban area.

An Article On Perfectionism – and it’s not perfect #MotownMom 💘🙌🏾

What is Perfectionism?

Perfectionism is defined as a meticulous drive to attain excellence. A perfectionist is one who has this characteristic.

Photo by alanna on Pexels.com

‘Perfectionism’ is a most prevalent belief in our civilization. Notice that I used the word ‘belief’.

Everywhere in this world of ours, perfectionism is regarded as good and desirable while imperfection is deem as bad or negative. Everybody wants everybody else to be perfect. Bosses want their employees to be flawless on the job. Parents want their kids to be the best. Perfectionists want their work and themselves to be perfect.

Since it is so strongly regarded as being positive, is Perfectionism really an absolute or universal value? In my opinion, it is not so.
To me, it is relative and is born of human conception. Perfection is an idea. It is an idea of a perceived ideal state of affair. However, things are the way they are. For every circumstances, the truth is what is at each instance. Perfection and imperfection are therefore merely attached values.

I am not suggesting that perfectionism is not good. I am suggesting that perhaps perfectionism can cast a controlling net over our expression of happiness. One can reach the required goal with or without being a perfectionist. To be a perfectionist, on the other hand, leave very little room for one to accept and love oneself unconditionally when a desired goal is not met. And when our desires are not met, we feel unhappy or cannot be fully satisfied. However, the truth is we only have each moment of the Present Moment to live in. By being perfectionist, our mind will be forever planning and thinking about the future or lamenting about what went wrong in the past. Because of these tendencies, many perfectionists are unable to feel satisfaction because in their perception they never seem to do things good enough to warrant that feeling of contentment.

From this, we can see a paradox of life. That is:

“How can one have PERFECT peace, self-love and joy when one is a perfectionist? “

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Watch “Grocery store household staples reportedly set to increase | GMA” on YouTube #motownmom

Not just humans but prices on food for pets

Blame it on pandemic, limited supply chain, the February freeze and shipping troubles.

This is even peanut butter too

I’m growing a garden, bulking up when things are on sale and trying lower cost option and did planning

What are you doing to bring your food bills down?