#MotownMom: Forgiveness Has Healed Me And Set Me Free via #blackruby

“Forgiveness is for you and not the other person,” is a statement that I’ve heard several times and it would always make me cringe. How would forgiving someone help me and set me free?

For a long time, I didn’t know how to forgive. I didn’t know how to “let go” of what someone else did which proved to be significant after my divorce. I never forgave my ex-husband because I was angry about what took place in our marriage and how it ended. I was satisfied with blaming him for his actions which made me very bitter.

Four years post my divorce, I decided to go on a spiritual and personal development journey to discover why I held so much anger. While on my journey, I realized that I was entertaining the same type of relationships which caused hurt and disappointment. My life wasn’t changing for the better. It was a new year and a different age, but the results were the same which led me to believe that I was a broken woman.

How could I be a broken woman? I took care of the home, I made sure that our children had what they needed, and went out with my friends occasionally. I spent time with family and did volunteer work.

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If you checked out my social media, I was always smiling and it appeared as if I was living my best life, but there was a pain that existed that no one could see, including me.

Truth be told, forgiveness was never a strength of mine. I just didn’t know how to let go of the hurt, frustration, and disappointment that would arise when the wrong people entered into my life, but today is a new day because I have chosen to forgive. By making it a choice, it opened my heart and mind to start a new journey.

It was also necessary to educate myself about forgiveness. The more I learned about it, the easier life became. Here is what I learned:

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